it’s like you’re drowning, and you try to swim up for breath, but you’re stuck in a paralysis, there’s hands coming out the darkness, pulling you back, you scream, but nobody ever hears you.
-- my thoughts of depression ( fxckinggg )
All my friends thought I was a very happy human being. Because that’s how I acted- like a really happy human being. But all that pretending made me tired. If I acted the way I felt, then I doubt my friends would have really hung out with me. So the pretending wasn’t all bad. The pretending made me less lonely. But in another way, it made me more lonely because I felt like a fraud. I’ve always felt like a fake human being.
--Last Night I Sang to the Monster (Benjamin Alire Sáenz)
I love him so much it hurts and I can’t stop thinking about him
I let him get under my skin and course through my veins like a virus
I’m addicted to his kisses like I’m addicted to 27’s
his touch electrifies me in the most beautiful way but
he’s just a boy with big brown eyes
and he has my heart at the tip of his fingers
and sometimes he squeezes a little too tight just to see if it hurts
and I let him
sometimes I touch the bruises later on
just so I have a reason to think of him
I’m a sad girl with sad eyes and a sad heart
I have scars on my wrists and
my rib cage shows
I need make up to feel pretty
and look at him he’s a fucking god
I adore him I adore him I adore him
im so sad
- Megan M.